December 2011
36 posts
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“WiFi is a basic human right. I’d rather have free WiFi than gay marriage....”
– my friend Phil, also a gay man, on his Xmas wish
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The Only Thing I Want to Tell You is My Order
One of the few things I hate about eating at Mendocino Farms is that they needlessly ask for my name when I order. I say “needlessly” because they distribute buzzers when customers place an order and the buzzer is how diners pick up their food. Each time I go to MF, my name is always a topic of conversation. They always make a big to-do out of the spelling, like, “Where does...
http://www.realitynation.com/real-housewives/recap-... →
My latest Housewives blog. Enjoy the snark.
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http://db.tt/8ujjcbc3 →
Dropbox has truly changed the way I save and retrieve documents. For years, I’ve used jump drives and a cumbersome process wherein I spend a shit load of time emailing MYSELF a ton of documents (not porn!) so that I can then later pull them up from multiple computers. Dropbox is a free digital cloud that SIGNIFICANTLY simplifies the aforementioned process. When you sign up for a free account...
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Each year, I wait on pins and needles for Barbara Walters to reveal the 10 most fascinating people of the year. That doesn’t sound right. Let me rephrase: Each year, watching her special is like driving pins and needles into my eyes. Much better.
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“Kill mean people with kindness; if that doesn’t work/kill them with scissors.”
– Ragan Fox, line from an unpublished, unreleased poem
3-Way Stop
1. Walk-up-to-order dining establishments, stop including a space for tips on your receipts. I don’t tip cashiers and shouldn’t be made to feel like an asshole for not doing so.
2. BACKING INTO parking spaces. 99% of the time, it’s easier to pull into and back out of a space. You aren’t saving time and, most of the time, you’re making your job harder.
3. This one is taken, albeit...
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bloated brevity
I’m tired of my 10-year-old blog. I don’t have the energy to muster up entire blog entries. Plus, I spent the last 10 years over-sharing. Big Brother gave me one thing I thought I wanted: a bigger audience. As the saying goes, be careful what you wish for. I spent the first 30+ years of my life showcasing the goriest, most deplorable aspects of my life. The pendulum is starting...